The Wondering Jew!

So this past week in my cross cultural conflict course they had us do an activity where out professor laid out some toys and we had to choose one or more that kind of suited us, and we used as a tool to tell a story about us. I my self wound up choosing an eskimo toy it was the closest thing I could find that was semi nomadic. so what I said really described who i was.

The Wondering Jew:
So I consider myself a wondering Jew, and I feel that label suites me very well. I mean as a culture Jews have wondered from one place to another, and life for the jews has been a constant never ending journey. And in a nut shell thats how I view my life, literally and metaphoricly. I love to travel and I have this major sense of adventure and the need to be on the go. but On top of that even though I am here in one place my mind and spirit always seems to be else where. But the interesting peice is i've view my life as a journey and over time the journies that I have taken have all led me to this point. From the journey of grad school and that chaotic period to the turn around attitude wise in high school to really trying finding myself as an adult in my college years. I returned from Israel and my life turned again to where I have found myself and who I am and what I want to do, and now I'm at the tail end of my educatioinal journey, and on to the next journey as a all out grown up in the real world. ( ok this sounded so much better and poetic when i did it in class lol)

all together right now I'm plugging away here at kent state working on a conflict mangement major. people always ask me what am I going to do with that? I always tell them well i'm going to solve the middle east issue in a week and a half after I graduate ( ok so I stole that line from mom). But this sem I am feeling really good about things and going really strong in my classes! after this semester I will have only a year left to go and then I'll be done (FINALLY).. along with my academics I am working presently as a taxi driver for a local cab company that an old high school friend runs! its been fun and quite stressful at the same time! but MAN DO I HAVE STORIES! If you know what taxi cab confessions are its been somewhat like that! all in all i'm happy healthy and doing well!! till next time everyone stay happy stay healthy and, I hope to see and hear from y'all soon!!

new year new life new focus!! (year in review & look to the future)

Well it has been a long time coming but I am back! And it is a new year and a new start! And life could be better could be worse!! It has been a bit over a year now since my return from the promise land and this year has been a roller coast ride like none other... with everything from heartbreak to jobs to a new and reinvigorated focus on life, and the fun I've had in life this year! this is a retrospect on this past year and a look a head to what lies ahead.
so lets kinda catch people up with things since my return from Israel! Since my return its been pretty rough. Since coming back my relationship with Laura and I is now over thankfully. It was a bad situation and things wound up happening in May that lead to the final dagger in the relationship.. Was it hard to handle and get over? yes... But honestly I'm a hundred times better off and much happier than I was back then! Now I'm single I'm able to live life have fun... But I am still looking and who knows what can happen...
Lately since the break up I've been able to live life to the fullest with no regrets, and enjoying every bit of it! I've been able to things that I love and enjoy from going to awesome concerts like Linkin Park, Hadag Nachash (TWICE), David Broza, Matisyahu! and THE ROC HIMSELF JAY-Z!! But that's only half the fun!! I've gone to 2 wrestling PPV's this year unforgiven here in Cleveland!!! and THE ROYAL RUMBLE THIS PAST SUN IN DETROIT!! NOW THERE WAS A THRILLER OF AN EXPERIENCE!!! but may I just say Joe Louis is not big guy friendly when it comes to leg space!!! But that's not all this week I get the chance to see the two Greatest stoners ever live and one of them isn't Keith Richards haha! No I get to see the classic comedy styles of Cheech Marin and Tommy Chong!! 'Dave is that you?!?' lol so I'm really stoked heck if I can I hope to see George Thorogood and the Destroyers so I'm looking forward to it if i could have that opportunity...
But this year hasn't been all fun and games unfortunately either... This year has like other years been a struggle in the job department... And it gets harder and harder each time. in this past year alone I have had about 5 or so jobs and its been tough holding on to them all. Some I left on a positive note and left it open to other open to other opportunities down the line. And others just flat out ended and it was and has been some of the tougher times for me.. considering I'm struggling and need a job. and in this market it's slim pickings and Cleveland isn't the best location and market for anything... thanks G.W. for screwing everything up and making things hard for the common man!
But even though there has been some bad times when theres bad times theres always something good to come out of it... Two weeks ago I started back at school at the local comm. college, with a new focus and a new sense of energy! ever since my second semester in my freshman year in high school I had the worst case of senioritis one can have!! and it wasn't till I realized my current situation that one I need a degree of some sort if I want to be successful, and get any where in life... And I'll admit since coming back from Israel I have definitely matured a lot and have grown over this year mentally and emotionally! I can see the prize at the end of the tunnel, and it definitely with in reach!! It is probably the greatest feeling I've had in a long time, and is a nice boost of confidence... I'm ready to succeed and I'm ready to start looking on to the future!!! and I hope to finish and grad by early august (mark your calenders).
This is going to be an exciting year with a lot to look forward to. I would like to wish everyone one the best and a happy and healthy new year! and I hope that I can write more consistently for you guys like I did in Israel.. but then again i don't have the type of thrills or stories to tell like i did. but time will tell.. till next time stay happy stay healthy! BOOMER F'N SOONER!!! PEACE TILL NEXT TIME!!!

BIG Z,

PS.. i WOULD LIKE TO ALSO SEND MY BEST WISHES AND PRAYERS TO MY FRIENDS WHO HAVE BEEN CALLED UP TO SERVICE THE PAST COUPLE MONTHS IN ISRAEL! MAY THEY STAY SAFE AND PROTECTED FROM THE MASS ATTACKS OF THE HAMAS TERRORISTS! MAY THEY RETURN SAFELY AND IN COMPLETE HEALTH. PLEASE SAY A PRAYER FOR OUR BROTHERS AND SISTERS WHO ARE PROTECTING THE LAND OF ISRAEL! AM YISRAEL CHAI!!!

My body is here in the west, but my HEART lays heavy where it belongs in the EAST... :-(

     Well, it has been almost a year to the date that I left this place I've called home ( Cleveland), for a place I have loved and only dreamed about (even though I had been there before) calling my home being in Israel. Right about now I would be doing last minute packing stressing out and wondering what would be. It was honestly one of the most emotional few days of my life. But once I landed and met up with Erez, with my new friend Marc, it was a great feeling to know that this was the beginning of one of my greatest adventures in life. One the not only brought together things from my past experiences there but one where I made new one's.

    It was a time that I will never forget. I got to see Family, and experience the joining of a new addition to the family at a ULTRA ORTHODOX WEDDING. along with the most amazing reconnection ever with old friends, who I miss dearly even to this day. The adventures that I was able to take all over the country were some of the best and most memorable, from meeting the potential future Ambassadors who came here to Cleveland, to Atlit where my first experience in Israel came around full circle and gave me closer of the experience of the true Israeli. To getting possibly the opportunity of a life time focusing my leadership skills and creating possible future ventures at BFL.

     It has equally been nice to see old friends from Israel here, and making new ones. With everyone from a friend who came across country to make a stop here and hang out,and seeing a sister of my best friend ( Shira Finkelstien,one of David's sibling) who I hadn't seen in about 15 years (unfortunately the curse lives on the finkelstiens know what I'm talking about hahaha), to making new ones in musicians on tour. And finally hopefully next month I get to see an old neighbor from Ramla, which would be awesome. But see there is still something missing... There is still a heavy emptiness inside as if my heart is truly not here...  

    It is 6000 miles away in a land far far away... Israel... and it lays heavily and strong in the promise land. Its crazy, i can clearly picture myself walking from the villa all over Ramla and the scenery as it whisked by on the sherut (special taxi) , bus, or train, as if i was still there. Its like I can still feel the pavement under me, the sight of the most beautiful flower bushes as I walked down the alley. To the most amazing scents over taking me in the shuks. To the sounds of the people shouting to friends or family asking if they are home or telling them to come home! to the most beautiful sound of Jews praying at the kottel on shabbas, and the calling of the Koran and to prayer from the masques.

   My heart is there and it is screaming for me to return HOME. My heart weeps and cries for my return to the promise land. My life is there! MY CALLING IS THERE!!! sigh my plan is to go back this time I hope for good. yes I know the struggles for the most part that I may and will likely face. Life will not be easy there. But it must be done... It is who I am it is only a matter of time. My hope, is by late spring/early summer of next year. At least in time for my Best friend ( Practically a brother to me) David's wedding. That is my dream, my ambition, my one and true passion... The promised land... So as we always say at Passover, NEXT YEAR IN JERUSALEM!!!  

ME AT BEN YEHUDAH                                                   ME AT THE WALL PRAYING

MY NEW FRIENDS AND PRACTICALLY FAMILY,

year in review

ladies and gents it is officially 2008! Happy New Year to one and all!  This is a very special entery today. This entery is a retrospective of the past year of 2007. A look back at a year of love, accomplishments, adventure, and a look into the future at what could be. This year was a year to be proud of when it comes to this family. This year I got to see both my brother and my sister graduate, Jacob from high school, and Shira from Miami of Ohio Univ. I must say I'm very proud of you two, you both have accomplished so much, and your futures arre very bright and strong. I'll admit I am jealous/admire the both of you for what you are doing and the success you both have. It is stuff I have yet to fully accomplish! I love you both and I am proud to call you two my Brother and Sister!

     This year was a pretty good year for me I have to say this year two dreams came true found someone I love and made it FINALLY to Israel! But lets start with the first thing love! In early March I met the love of my life Laura Goodman! We met and started talking online through Jdate but it took her a year to actually to actualy contact me even though I myself contacted her 4 times prior. She was initially hesitant to contact me because she saw my profile "Oklahoma1" and thought "Oh My God a Musical freak!" no no no I'm not a musical freak yes I do like musicals and kinda like the musical Oklahoma but i Chose that SN becuase of well the obvious! I'M FROM OKLAHOMA! After her actually reading my profile she saw I was pretty interesting and the rest is history as we like to say! Its been tough we have been together for about 10 months now 5 physically together and 4.5 with me away so it depends on how you want to look at it! we've either been together for 10months or 5 hard to really say! I love her to death she's a wonderful woman and has shown me a lot of what it truly means to be loved and in a relationship. granted it has been a very rough begining with me being away we have had our fair share of issues and what not. But we have fought past them and WE are still going strong! i love her to death and would go to hell and back for her. which i have basically. Laura thank you for standing by me during all this I know for the both of us its very tough. and well We both have had our issues and what not. but we've held it together! Thank you from the bottom of my heart. for everything! i'm almost home! I miss you!

        Also this year as I have been in beautiful Israel! Finaly a dream come true granted yes I have been here 3 times before I havent really "lived" here persay until now.. for those who don't fully know I have been here on a 5 month volunteer program here in a little nothing much town called Ramla (not to be mistaken for Ramala), doing various things from tutoring in english, to helping in a elderly center teaching them how to use the computer playing card games and what not. I also helped in a after school program tutoring in english and doing various other activities with them. I loved it very much. and I've had other fun experiences here everything ranging from, volunteering on a army base to being here for the high holidays, and chanukah (in jerusalem at the wall!) I also had the chance to go to various fun programs like BFL Building future Leaders. A leadership program where they had us create program that could be done here in Israel and back home, what ever that may mean..  Doing this program has definitely changed me in many ways. I have definitely noticed a new sense of maturity, and responsability come out of me. a sense that I can do things for myself. I'll admit I'm still struggling believing in myself and having the confidence that i can succeed. Do I feel like I have accomplished anything here? Yes. it has been hard to really tell initially but yes I can say I have. and I can't wait to transist back home and try out the new and improved me.

       This has been a pretty decent year to say the least. a year of firsts! first love, first taste of true independent success, first taste of any success if even a tiny bit. I would like to thank my parents and my grandparents for giving me such a great oppertunity to experience this fully possible, I love you all. Laura thank you for standing be me and supporting me as you have. i know that it has been a rough few months and we have made it work. I love you very much you are my heart and soul. I couldnt have done this with out you. I'm almost home. I can't wait to see everyone and tell all the stories i have to tell. and show you all the great memories and pictures. i love you all! till next time! PEACE FROM THE MIDDLE EAST AND HAPPY NEW YEAR! ZAC!

it all comes together and a sense of accomplishment!

      This past week was yet another exciting session unfortunately was the last session of BUILDING FUTURE LEADERS CONFERENCE! the first day was a interesting one on thurs. We had the honor of hearing the great and interesting speaker Neil Lazerus talk about public speaking. It was interesting, he talked about how to give a good presentation. he basicaly said take the rule book of public speaking and throw it out the window! hehe! he had some of us including myself come up and give everyone a brief preview of what we had interms of our presentations, and he critiqued us as we went along. We found it quite hilarious and yet useful, it definitely took a big weight off our sholders and gave us a different view of how to present and what not!

      Friday was even more interesting in the morning we woke up nice and early to go to Neot Kedumim ( nature preserve)  in the morning to work on our team work skills! yes team work!!! So we started out by doing a hula-hoop activity that was fun and "hava nagila" like! hehe ( long story). We then took a tram a bit ways down and we saw sheep and goats! now you're probably wondering what's sheep and goats have to do with team work and team building!?!? Well I'm glad you asked! well if one watchs a pack of sheep and goats the goats basicaly lead and the sheep follow. How ever as for us our challenge was to herd the sheep and goats  from one point to another in groups of 7-8 people in under 10 min. I must say for people who have never herded sheep before, we did a hellava job!  we did it in 9 min even though another group did it in 5 but hey it was fun it was an experience. Then we did this thing where theres one person was in the middle and there was ahook that had 4 ropes that were on pullies in 4 different sides and a sistern, and a bucket  theres 4 pullers who couldnt talk and the person in the middle is giving directions however he cant talk either. it was a interesting experience it taught me that not one person is more important than the other in a job. in the end we felt pretty self accomplished.  \Friday night we had a little program in review! who's line is it any way style! hehe! it was fun and entertaining.

     saturday there was mostly small little break out sessions talking about last minute things for our project ( thoughts, feelings, concerns) and fundraising and what not. that evening we had a nice little graduation ceremony of sort from the program. it was nice some people presented their projects and we got certificates of completion. it was sad to see it end it was tough to part for the family that was built in 3 months time! they are awesome! and i would like to thank the organizors of the program for one bringing us together like you did and also for giving us such a great oppertunity of a life time!

     In other excitement I had the chance to see David one last time before I go home! I also got to see his parents who were in town this week! unfortunately I believe i'm jinxed! see when ever i've been around his parents something has always happened. last time i saw them in cleveland they were held up and had their jewlery stolen. now this time around both david forgot his wallet on the bus and his dad got his stolen all in the same day! luckily a religious jew found it and hopefully will be smart enough to get it back to him at the university!  also I had the chance to see former Cleveland shalichah Tovit! today for a nice little meet up and talk just to quickly catch up and what not. it was great seeing them all the last few days! well thats it for now please stay tuned for a very special NEW YEARS EDITION OF MY BLOG! AND I KNOW YOU GUYS BACK IN THE STATES IT'S NOT THE NEW YEAR YET BUT STILL. HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Till next time all Peace from this middle east !and also wanted to wish you all a happy new years too!!!

Zac m.!

THE REAL SPIRIT OF SHABBAS/ AND DON'T WORRY I'M SAFE

So this past weekend I wound up going to a shabbaton, and the theme of the shabbaton was Judaism and judaism in Israel. on friday we had mostly introductions. but that was nothing compared to what we had friday night. Jerusalem one of the most holiest cities in the world / Israel especially for the Jews. As I said before there's just a totally different feel to the city when you are there especially on shabbas. So friday night they offered us our choice of places for shabbat services, and I honestly couldn't have thought more of a appropriate choice than going to the kottel. hehe yes I know I've pretty much been to the kottel god knows how many times in the past 2 weeks but seriously it's only fitting. it was an amazing sight to see! a swarm of well mostly orthodox jews, and some birthright participants tossed in. it was a sight that is just breath taking! to hear hundreds of Jews Wailing in prayer and dovaning in unison almost was amazing to hear the different tunes and different sounds of prayer is just a beautiful sound.

        I myself found my way to the back corner where a group of soldiers were singing and dancing and what not! so i decided to join them! I started dancing and the energy exuming from these soldiers in prayer and well just nigunim ( jewish songs) is just amazing! I've never been so moved in prayer and in the spirituality of shabbat than I did that night at that moment. its something i've been searching for in my life for a long time. just being there with the soldiers dovaning was special and an honor. and i look around and to see more jews singing and dancing and praying its like non-other. the spirit of the jewish religion and tradition of shabbat was every where and was strong that night. it's amazing and hard to explain.

      Later that night was even more interesting of a experience. through out the weekend they introduced us to the various sects of the religion minus the secular and Charedi side of it but thats ok. Friday night they invited a orthodox man to come in and lead us and teach us about what is a "Tish" ( or singing around a table) again nigunim. whats a tish you may ask? well a tish is a hassidic event where they gather around a table and sing nigunim, tell stories and drink. soo thats what we did. granted people mostly had a just shot (dont worry i didnt drink) hehe! but it was deffinitley an experience that i'll never forget.

        So a few little things. As you all know I was in Jerusalem for most of the week and chag the last two weeks. During that time I have seen the bomb squad called in and take care of business almost every time i went this past week. But don't worry people everything is fine they did what they had to do, and i would like to thank the Israeli bomb squad for dealing with things efficiantly and keeping us safe. however something that hit more close to home and i'm sorry for making a certian someone nervous when this event happened. a few nights ago there was a couple of events that happened. one was there was an attack in the gaza strip where israeli airforce went in and blew up the houses of a few terrorists. also there was an assasination in near by (neighboring city) Lod of two people in the underground. I was up at the time of the attack along with one of my house mates and well we could hear the explosion from our house. please do not worry we are completely fine and safe! absolutely no one in our group was hurt we were all home and in the house.. does these events make me nervous as i'm sure hearing it here makes you nervous. yes it does but you can't let these things affect you at all, and you move on as much as possible as if nothing happened. but again do not worry I am perfectly fine! along with everyone else is here. aside from that we are now at the two week and counting mark. shocking i know how time is flying. and i'm slowly starting mentally preping to come home is it tough to do so especially after all i've gone through and done?!? yes. but i'll be ok.. I might be flipping out next week or so trying to get things done and ready buy i'm fighting through it all and hopefully do ok. well that's it for right now. hope everyone is doing well! and if i do not post a new post before next weekend I would like to wish everyone a happy and healthy new year!  psst mom 2 weeks! hehe oh shoot mom you didnt read that ( ok i'm just trying to get out of shoveling and dishes hehe). Love you all! till next time PEACE FROM THE MIDDLE EAST!

capturing the essence and spirit of a chag

  

 I've been celebrating chanukah for 24 years now, and I honestly can say that this year definitely felt different. it's true what a lot of israeli's say especially the secular.See in American Judaism and Israeli Judaism is two total different things. how things are observed and the spirits of things in both worlds. and now i can see what they both are like.

   American Judaism is based more on a symbolic observancy. In America we as Jews need to do actually observe the holidays and go services, and do everything to the end. (i.e. light candles, go to services, spin the dreidal, build a sukkah, shake the lulav and etrog.) in order to bring us closer religiously. to make us feel like we are really Jews. If we don't, some lose that jewish identity and the spirit.

   Israeli Judaism is a bit more spiritual than anything. When it comes to Israeli Jews they have been said to not really need to observe or actualy symobolicly observe the holidays or shabbas to make them feel jewish. there is a certian essence a certian spirit in the air in this country that the jews draw from they are so surrounded by holy sites and also surrounded by observant jews that there is more of a feeling of being jewish than anything.

     I can honestly say that i can now see what they mean. over the last few days on the second as mentioned in my last blog the 6th and the 8th night of chanukah i took advantage and wound up going to Jerusalem for the day and go to the kottel for candle lighting. It was amazing just to be there. there is a total different atmosphere that can be sensed in the air in jerusalem on any chag. and over the eight days there was a definite build up of the holiday. second night there wasn't that many people at the kottel granted the navy officers were there for their graduation but on the last night there was a bunch of people there the mens side had a lot of people the womans side was packed and the rotunda.. there were soldiers and scouts, and tourists galore. but there was a spirit surrounding the Kottel as they lit the menorah and itwas amazing and beautiful.

 

    

Its interesting going around the country you can sense a change in the atmosphere when it comes to the essense of the area the spirit. for instance i've been in ramla or most of the holidays and a bit in tel-aviv and Hod hasharon and I can say it feels like it is kind of your average city plus there is a definite presense of the other religions. like if you were in Tel-aviv for shabbas or holidays everything is mostly still going on te city and people are still on the move. but you go to Jerusalem and there is the religious spirit surrounding the area on shabbas everything stops, the entire city becomes a ghost town its amazing. I was moved by the feeling of just being in the kottel on the last night. just being there on the last night i see every thing around me just being surrounded by so many jews . it left me kind of speechless like none other. we always hear next year in jerusalem! well guess what!?! I was there! I'm here! it definitely gave me the greatest feeling to realize that for once i've made a dream come true in being jerusalem for a holiday being in israel in general for all these great holidays. I love it! thank you mom and to both my grandparents for helping me get here. and allowing me to have this experience. and thank you laura for having the strength to let me go for these 5 mnths i know its been hard but we're doing great! i love you all you dont know how much this meant to me. well till next time y'all PEACE FROM THE MIDDLE EAST AND HAPPY BELATED HANUKAH.

ps. I was in ben yehudah and I got myself a new talit! it's amazing its one of those big square ones and it has black and gold stripes its amazing! WOOO HOOO!!!